What are dream crushers? Have you met any? Ever been unfortunate enough come close to one? You wouldn’t know until all the strength in you has been sapped out. Until then, you would be praising them and putting them on the highest pedestals. But who are they, really?
They are the people who believe they are doing the world a favor by making you “face harsh reality” and influence* you to give up even before you start, or even think of starting. They are the people who plucks your most cherished childhood memories one by one and make you see that things weren’t really what you remember them to be. There is a reason why we were meant to live innocent childhoods, and it’s so we can battle the cynicism the evil world will force on us when we grow older – a place to look back at and give us hope. These people surely hated feeling helpless and not knowing better when they were children.
They are the people who “take you to school.” They recognize you are good and know that you know you are good so they make it their life’s goal to break your belief. They feed on the powerful and make sure they make people in the loftiest positions bow down to them. They take pride in bosses confiding in them, leaders asking for their opinions, and older and wiser people looking like fools in front of them.
They are the people who attain power and position not because of personal ambition but because they have pulled the wool over the eyes of the other people who they were able to convince to be weak, helpless and lost. Little lost lamb need a shepherd to guide them through the darkness, right? Having convinced you that your dreams are not yours, or your dreams are not realistic for a person like you, you allow them to control your life and steer it in the direction they want it to take.
But these dream crushers are not interested in making your life better after you hand them the reigns. They have achieved the goal of breaking you and turning you into their puppet – brainless and completely dependent. After you no longer know how to move on your own, they kick you around and ask the question of a lifetime: “What do you want to do with your life?”
“I don’t know, Master. What do you want me to do with my life?” They get frustrated with your weakness and incompetence. Soon after, they throw you into a corner. Since you need them to get you moving, you try to impress them for a bit so they would pick you up again. With all the effort in the world, you lift your limbs and show a glimmer of independence. After moving around on your own a bit, they notice you and pick you up again with a smile on their face. “Good job, my little puppet! I see you can move on your own again… But you’re doing it wrong! This is how…”
Now sapped of your own will and questioning if all your actions are correct, you turn to them all the time for approval. But this is not something they give easily, if at all. They don’t know what they want themselves. They want you down and dependent on them, but they want you moving about on your own – with all strings attached.
If you’re a person who keeps on trying to please a dream crusher, you’re in for the worst experience of your life. Get out of it as quickly as you can. You may not come out unscathed, but at least you will still have a little sense of self. However, if you are too deep in, expect that you no longer know what and who you are, think that you are any good, or know that you can make anything out of yourself. Time is your only friend in this case. Heal, then face the world again as a stronger, although different, person.
*These people take pride in their power to influence. They do not direct, instruct or order. They operate in such a way that they have wormed your way into you without your knowing. Just by a single appreciative reaction – or actually the lack thereof – they are able to make you doubt or affirm your actions.