Mental Fortitude 101

Boss Peach kept telling us, "Know your numbers."
That line has been ringing in my ear for six days now.
I’m happy of being assured of a job. It’s exhillirating to be back in action after quite a few weeks of petiks time. But now, I need to know my stuff. ALL my stuff.
I could just see it now. The position being offered to me is no footman’s job. Even if it is not my responsibility to drive the numbers, it is my responsibility to know all of them… and by all, I’m referring to all three LOBs and sub-divisions of the site.
It gets even more daunting when I know I’m up against all three Business Units who are anti-Quality WHILE the remaining two people I’ll be working with are anti-me. Give me a break!
A friend of mine once told me "A person strength is measured by the size of his enemy." Well, okay… that makes a thousand men in this case. Quite Biblical, don’t you think?
Boss Peach has always shown people who’s boss. How does she do it? I NEED to know!
A lot is expected of me… but I expect a lot more from myself!
Our Site Director is now testing my powers at giving orders and task delegation. GOOD LUCK! I’m used to always taking the orders, not giving ’em! At the same time, I don’t want to disappoint her and show her my weak side thus my situation is greatly frustrating me!
For the past months, I used to mentally tack a post-it in my brain with the note "Get stronger!" everytime I remember. Now, no more reminding needed. When I wake in the morning "Get stronger"… while I walk out to the jeep "Get stronger"… while I eat "Get stronger"… while I bathe "Get stronger"… while I smoke "Get stronger" It is now my mantra.
Sheesh! Even my dreams are filled with work. So many times, I have woken myself up in the past nights shouting "So what are we doing about this?!" and "Why don’t you know?!" and "I need this by Tuesday!" *Gasp* Allow me to rest!
No compromising of data. Gone are the days when the Verbatim Analyses are magically finished. 😉
No cheat sheets. Memorize the weekly and quarterly numbers by heart during each Ops Review.
No firewall. Wear asbestos for your own safety.
No deadline extensions. Or you’re dead.
The Site Director told me last Thursday, "This is a great position to be in. If you do very well, you would surely shine and take center stage. However, if you do poorly, this will break you." Thus, FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION!!
Everything is just beginning. I’m far from tired and burnt out. But, I will not allow myself to get burnt out. I will take vacations when things are already too tough to handle. I will try to create a balance between work and life unlike before. I will try not to stay too long in the office. I will try to bum around the house.
To my detractors, all I have to say is "Thank you for helping me get stronger."

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